If you have heard me speak, or known me for any length of time, you know I talk alot about perspective – probably because mine is constantly in need of re-adjustment. If I am to be honest with you now, my focus was in need of help today. These truths are what I found when the Lord shifted my gaze:
Marriage. It is a mix of ups and downs, wins and losses, tears and laughs, fights and kisses, conversations and silence, and it is most certainly full of surprises – good and bad.
Although we know better than to do so, it is easy to get caught in the “comparison trap” when it comes to certain areas of life. Many of us, sometimes, try to line our marriages up side by side with social media posts and the images of couples presenting their best selves to the public. I, too, have been guilty of only wanting others to see the good, because really, who wants to see my ugly anyway, right? Yet, admitting how we struggle, get upset, and still love each other at the same time is a beautiful thing.
Instead of lining our expectations up with what God says we are to be for one another, we are so easily distracted by what we think we are supposed to be. Envy and unrealistic expectations lead to error in judgement – and disgruntled spouses.
The Lord wants more goodness for our union than we could ever imagine. But friend, marriage is work. Love is arduous at times. I am finding marriage takes a creative kinda grit, the pursuit of remembering, and a surrendered soul of prayer. Micah gave wise instruction I am finding works in marriage as well – do what’s right, love mercy, and walk humbly with God.
My yesterday began with “fights” but, thankfully, ended with goodnight “kisses” of forgiveness. And so, today as my sweetheart was away with our Senior, at her college orientation, I made a choice to remember how I love him and how he loves me – and, most importantly, how God loves us both.